12.29.14 Dailies

MONDAY


"The Ladies". Always texting,
always popular, always entertaining.
It's high school all over again.

Why is Nick Jonas' new song so catchy? I love how throwback 80's music is popular right now. And when did Nick Jonas graduate from cheesy boy band dude to hot new solo artist?

These things trouble me.

Don't believe me? Every woman at the ice rink the other day sang along when "Jealous" played. All ages, ethnicities. Kristyl and I tried unsuccessfully to hit the high notes and scared a few people.

I brought this weighty topic to the lunch table today for the consideration of The Ladies of the The Popular Table. After much debate (mostly while texting, so they were only partly paying attention), The Committee will henceforth refers to this phenomenon as the "Justin Timberlake Blueprint".

The Justin Timberlake Blueprint

Member of popular/cheesy boy band breaks away from the group and successfully rebrands himself as a hot solo artist.

Step 1: Separate yourself from your cheesy boy band image by doing something raunchy. (aka, "the Miley Cyrus strategy").

Step 2: Your breakout hit must border the pop/r&b genres. Once played on an r&b station, you're in.

Step 3: Your breakout hit must contain lyrics that makes us feel sexy or beautiful.

Step 4: Throw in lots of high notes for the ladies to swoon over. We love it when guys hit the high notes. It's like a singer's way of saying, "I'm comfortable enough with my sexuality to hit that note."

So ordered.





TUESDAY
lol!!!


Best Triple Bitchslap Performed by a Burrito



WEDNESDAY

Forgot to post something before I left.

 

This year was an interesting year. I learned a whole lot more about myself...including things I really didn't want to know. I learned that I'm getting older. My body is changing, I'm growing more stubborn, and my butt is out of control.

 

I learned that I am fragile, but kind. I learned that humility and acts of kindness go hand-in-hand. I learned that a stranger's kind face can hide a heart of hate and destruction. And that a friend doesn't just chat with you every day, or about the easy stuff, but will be there when you want to talk about the cringe-worthy stuff. I unwillingly recognized the importance of financial stability and DIY'ing (doing it myself).

 

I discovered that my want for independence masks a deeper need for protection and security, and my mistrust in things/people that promise them. In a circular irony, the people that promise what I need are the very people from whom I run. 

 

A large part of my path for 2015 is immovable. I can't escape it and therefore I have to accept it and embrace it. I have to consider it when making my resolutions. I resolve to be more patient. I vow to buy fewer pairs of shoes and way more corsets. I vow to try to watch Star Wars, geezus god...again.

 

I said try.

 

I promise to visit the spider exhibit at the Oregon Insect Zoo during my visit to Portland next month. Did I ever mention why I'm afraid of spiders? So one day I did something bad...can't remember what...and my father sat me in a closet. And I remember all these teeny little white spiders hatching from an egg somewhere on the ceiling and gliding down all around me.  There had to be hundreds. I remember swatting at them and crying for my father to let me out. I could've just opened the door, but He'd told me to stay put.

 

So spiders in 2015.

 

Most importantly, I resolve to gain more humility. I need to grasp the insignificance of my place on this planet. Because I want to feel the obligation to help others without regard for my own self-perceived importance. 

 

Ake mashite omedeto, peeps.

THURSDAY

No work today...Holiday Pay Say WHAAA!?

 

DAMMIT I forgot I'm salary now.

 

Took my cousin to 526 in Royal Oak, then we walked across the street to a spot to catch up. We ordered way too much food. Don't you hate being that one person who walks around the entire city with a carry out container like its your scraps for the rest of the week?  lol

 

I'm addicted to photo insta effecting. 

 

Insta effecting. That's a thing.  Don't argue with me.

 

Currently crushing on the InstaCollage app. Not to be confused with love.  Because I'm currently in love with my electric blanket.  Always and forever. Yes, I know those are words to a song. I've sung them to my blanket.

 

Seriously.  Warm it up for like 10 minutes before bedtime, and you'll swear you're sliding into heaven's pearly gates.

 

Even if you're a strong atheist. The blanket will convert you.

FRIDAY

I messed up a perfectly good plot of land in Second Life. It was just right two months ago. Fall forest. Then I decided to winter up.  No idea why. So I'll log on to star and laugh or point or move something to the left or right or pay rent. I'm calling it a work in progress.



SATURDAY

Meanwhile, in my damn uterus...